I am angry. Very angry. Note the time(4am). I am still at work. It is maybe three hours from my last blog. Except I am consumed with a rage not known to the average man. I want to feel pain. That which is deep within oozes forever upwards, bubbling to the surface in a slow steady goo, creating a swamp of what was once a lush meadow. Cheery landscape replaced by bleak surroundings, nothing the same, everything eventual.
No one knows what it's like
To feel these feelings
Like I do
And I blame you
No one bites back as hard
On their anger
None of my pain and woe
Can show through
No one knows what its like
To be mistreated, to be defeated
Behind blue eyes
These blue eyes are windows to a damaged soul. They hide the emptiness, the mistrust. They disguise me, and I mascarade as a steady soul, as a person whole. I am not. I am hollow, a vessel to be filled with pain and suffering, holding happiness for a fleeting moment but absorbing all the anguish. Give me yours, I will take it, I will carry your troubles and leave behind my own. A knife to kiss my skin, to make me feel. The sweet crimson of blood, tainting the air, iron and mineral. What I would give to leave this pain, to forget the pain you caused me. But I cannot. It dwells within, a monster of the grandest proportions, sucking all that is good, growing and consuming. Do you know what you've done to me? Would you even care if I pointed it out?
I want to bleed until my heart beats dry.
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